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1.1 root 1: Warning:
2: The fortunes contained in the fortune database have been collected
3: haphazardly from a cacophony of sources, in number so huge it
4: boggles the mind. It is impossible to do any meaningful quality
5: control on attributions, or lack thereof, or exactness of the quote.
6: Since this database is not used for profit, and since entire works
7: are not published, it falls under fair use, as we understand it.
8: However, if any half-assed idiot decides to make a profit off of
9: this, they will need to double check it all, and nobody not involved
10: of such an effort makes any warranty that anything in the database
11: bears any relation to the real world of literature, law, or other
12: bizzarrity.
13:
14: ==> GENERAL INFORMATION
15: By default, fortune retrieves its fortune files from the directory
16: /usr/share/games/fortune. A fortune file has two parts: the source file
17: (which contains the fortunes themselves) and the data file which describes
18: the fortunes. The data fil always has the same name as the fortune file
19: with the string ".dat" concatenated, i.e. "fort" is the standard fortune
20: database, and "fort.dat" is the data file which describes it. See
21: strfile(8) for more information on creating the data files.
22: Fortunes are split into potentially offensive and not potentially
23: offensive parts. The offensive version of a file has the same name as the
24: non-offensive version with "-o" concatenated, i.e. "fort" is the standard
25: fortune database, and "fort-o" is the standard offensive database. The
26: fortune program automatically assumes that any file with a name ending in
27: "-o" is potentially offensive, and should therefore only be displayed if
28: explicitly requested, either with the -o option or by specifying a file name
29: on the command line.
30: Potentially offensive fortune files should NEVER be maintained in
31: clear text on the system. They are rotated (see caesar(6)) 13 positions.
32: To create a new, potentially offensive database, use caesar to rotate it,
33: and then create its data file with the -x option to strfile(8). The fortune
34: program automatically decrypts the text when it prints entries from such
35: databases.
36: Anything which would not make it onto network prime time programming
37: (or which would only be broadcast if some discredited kind of guy said it)
38: MUST be in the potentially offensive database. Fortunes containing any
39: explicit language (see George Carlin's recent updated list) MUST be in the
40: potentially offensive database. Political and religious opinions are often
41: sequestered in the potentially offensive section as well. Anything which
42: assumes as a world view blatantly racist, mysogynist (sexist), or homophobic
43: ideas should not be in either, since they are not really funny unless *you*
44: are racist, mysogynist, or homophobic.
45: The point of this is that people have should have a reasonable
46: expectation that, should they just run "fortune", they will not be offended.
47: We know that some people take offense at anything, but normal people do have
48: opinions, too, and have a right not to have their sensibilities offended by
49: a program which is supposed to be entertaining. People who run "fortune
50: -o" or "fortune -a" are saying, in effect, that they are willing to have
51: their sensibilities tweaked. However, they should not have their personal
52: worth seriously (i.e., not in jest) assaulted. Jokes which depend for their
53: humor on racist, mysogynist, or homophobic stereotypes *do* seriously
54: assault individual personal worth, and in an general entertainment medium
55: we should be able to get by without it.
56:
57: ==> FORMATTING
58: This file describes the format for fortunes in the database. This
59: is done in detail to make it easier to keep track of things. Any rule given
60: here may be broken to make a better joke.
61:
62: [All examples are indented by one tab stop -- KCRCA]
63:
64: Numbers should be given in parentheses, e.g.,
65:
66: (1) Everything depends.
67: (2) Nothing is always.
68: (3) Everything is sometimes.
69:
70: Attributions are two tab stops, followed by two hyphens, followed by a
71: space, followed by the attribution, and are *not* preceded by blank
72: lines. Book, journal, movie, and all other titles are in quotes, e.g.,
73:
74: $100 invested at 7% interest for 100 years will become $100,000, at
75: which time it will be worth absolutely nothing.
76: -- Lazarus Long, "Time Enough for Love"
77:
78: Attributions which do not fit on one (72 char) line should be continued
79: on a line which lines up below the first text of the attribution, e.g.,
80:
81: -- A very long attribution which might not fit on one
82: line, "Ken Arnold's Stupid Sayings"
83:
84: Single paragraph fortunes are in left justified (non-indented) paragraphs
85: unless they fall into another category listed below (see example above).
86: Longer fortunes should also be in left justified paragraphs, but if this
87: makes it too long, try indented paragraphs, with indentations of either one
88: tab stop or 5 chars. Indentations of less than 5 are too hard to read.
89:
90: Laws have the title left justified and capitalized, followed by a colon,
91: with all the text of the law itself indented one tab stop, initially
92: capitalized, e.g.,
93:
94: A Law of Computer Programming:
95: Make it possible for programmers to write in English and
96: you will find the programmers cannot write in English.
97:
98: Limericks are indented as follows, all lines capitalized:
99:
100: A computer, to print out a fact,
101: Will divide, multiply, and subtract.
102: But this output can be
103: No more than debris,
104: If the input was short of exact.
105:
106: Accents precede the letter they are over, e.g., "`^He" for e with a grave
107: accent. Underlining is done on a word-by-word basis, with the underlines
108: preceding the word, e.g., "__^H^Hhi ____^H^H^H^Hthere".
109:
110: No fortune should run beyond 72 characters on a single line without good
111: justification (er, no pun intended). And no right margin justification,
112: either. Sorry. For BSD people, there is a program called "fmt" which can
113: make this kind of formatting easier.
114:
115: Definitions are given with the word or phrase left justified, followed by
116: the part of speech (if appropriate) and a colon. The definition starts
117: indented by one tab stop, with subsequent lines left justified, e.g.,
118:
119: Afternoon, n.:
120: That part of the day we spend worrying about how we wasted
121: the morning.
122:
123: Quotes are sometimes put around statements which are funnier or make more
124: sense if they are understood as being spoken, rather than written,
125: communication, e.g.,
126:
127: "All my friends and I are crazy. That's the only thing that
128: keeps us sane."
129:
130: Ellipses are always surrounded by spaces, except when next to punctuation,
131: and are three dots long.
132:
133: "... all the modern inconveniences ..."
134: -- Mark Twain
135:
136: Human initials always have spaces after the periods, e.g, "P. T. Barnum",
137: not "P.T. Barnum". However, "P.T.A.", not "P. T. A.".
138:
139: All fortunes should be attributed, but if and only if they are original with
140: somebody. Many people have said things that are folk sayings (i.e., are
141: common among the folk (i.e., us common slobs)). There is nothing wrong with
142: this, of course, but such statements should not be attributed to individuals
143: who did not invent them.
144:
145: Horoscopes should have the sign indented by one tab stop, followed by the
146: dates of the sign, with the text left justified below it, e.g.,
147:
148: AQUARIUS (Jan 20 - Feb 18)
149: You have an inventive mind and are inclined to be progressive. You
150: lie a great deal. On the other hand, you are inclined to be
151: careless and impractical, causing you to make the same mistakes over
152: and over again. People think you are stupid.
153:
154: Single quotes should not be used except as quotes within quotes. Not even
155: single quotes masquerading as double quotes are to be used, e.g., don't say
156: ``hi there'' or `hi there' or 'hi there', but "hi there". However, you
157: *can* say "I said, `hi there'".
158:
159: A long poem or song can be ordered as follows in order to make it fit on a
160: screen (fortunes should be 19 lines or less if at all possible) (numbers
161: here are stanza numbers):
162:
163: 11111111111111111111
164: 11111111111111111111
165: 11111111111111111111 22222222222222222222
166: 11111111111111111111 22222222222222222222
167: 22222222222222222222
168: 33333333333333333333 22222222222222222222
169: 33333333333333333333
170: 33333333333333333333 44444444444444444444
171: 33333333333333333333 44444444444444444444
172: 44444444444444444444
173: 44444444444444444444
174:
175:
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